3.04.2009

So much for that plan . . .

I had said that once March came around, I would get my world back on a schedule. Seriously, you think I would learn not to make any of these grand plans by now!

Hubby was supposed to be back to normal working hours this week so I thought it would be a good time to try to get The Bear and I back on track. Hubby is actually going to a school this week so he has rather cushy hours. He deserves it after working non-stop for 6 months, but it's making it difficult to get that schedule rolling. AND, we might have had a snow storm Sunday night/Monday morning which meant we all stayed home in PJs on Monday.

I'm beginning to question what normal is for us.
Hubby was gone for 6 months. Does doing something for half a year make it normal?
We only lived here for 3 months before he was deployed. Is that the normal I'm looking for?
What about our live in South Carolina before here? That was just a year though. I'm hoping that isn't our normal. SC and I really don't mesh well.
Am I grasping at straws and trying to revert to the normal from Illinois? I had just graduated and was working full time. Hubby was still in school. The Bear was just a thought for some day.

I feel like I'm going through all this stress and frustration to get to normal when there is no normal. We don't live a life in which we'll have a normal. Our world is constantly in flux. Hubby is home and will be working port hours . . . for a month and a half. Then he's leaving for dive school. Then home a few weeks and out for an underway. Then home. Then gone. Then home. Then gone.

I don't know what it is about me that feels the need to have order. To have plans. It just causes so much more anxiety for me (and Hubby who has to deal with me). I know I need to relax and let things just be. How do you do that though? Does anyone have a plan for that to happen? See - back to the needing a plan. What did my parents do to me? :-)

I'm working on it though. Maybe over the next 8 1/2 years I'll get a hang of this military life thing. Just in time for Hubby to retire :-)

2 comments:

Jennifer said...

Maybe your normal isn't the typical person's normal, but hey! Who said being normal was all that anyway? ;-)

Betty said...

Hang in there, I can just imagine how hard it is on your guys. But don't give up it will work itself out. :)



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